My wife complains that I never surprise her anymore with “date night” so I decided to do something about it. I know setting the mood is critical, so I planned every detail before I woke her at 4am with a cup of coffee, English muffin and our grocery list. Some might say going to WinCo hardly qualifies as a date. On that, I strongly disagree. I think when its done right it can be very romantic! On the way to the store she was very quiet but she’s not a morning person so I thought little of it. I did all the shopping so that she could just roam around and enjoy herself. Upon arriving home, I put away all the groceries and then I noticed she had an attitude. You would think with all my planning everything would naturally progress towards romance, right? Wrong. Within minutes she started in on me for waking her up so early. She also strongly disagreed with me that anybody would think grocery shopping is romantic in any way shape or form. I’m not sure where my plan failed, but it could have been when I forgot the reusable grocery bags and had to pay 5 cents per bag. In my experience, that’s pretty much a mood killer every time.
Greg Rosen is a humorist writer for several major newspapers in the Portland area.