I know some of you may not consider a humorist writer to be an expert on matters of the heart, but I assure you I am, I rarely just make these things up. After all these years together my family and friends see the wondrous love that my wife and I share together, and to be honest I think they get a little jealous. Since gift giving is a way of saying I love you or I care, every year about this time I start getting phone calls and emails and they all ask the same thing, “Greg, what is the perfect gift to get my wife for Christmas?”
Keeping romance alive is easy if you know what to do.
This is something you really need to know. With Christmas approaching many of you are totally screwing things up! However, if you follow my instructions, I will bring back the sparkle to your wife’s eyes and romance like you are newlyweds all over again! You might want to write this down and put it up on your refrigerator with all those other important notes and reminders. When I give my wife valuable and potentially life changing advice, I always make a point to put it on the fridge so she can see it. I should note my wife repurposes everything she likes until she cannot repurpose it anymore. I love the way she cares enough about the environment to get the most out of everything, including every note, letter, recommendation, and suggestion I give her. I know this because after she reads them, she repurposes them as fire starters in our woodstove.
The perfect gift she will never forget
Ok, Here goes…most of you make this common mistake year after year. Quit buying expensive jewelry, high-quality purses, and perfume. She will not remember things like that, in fact within weeks it will be like it never happened. I solved this by buying my wife a nice high-quality mop a few years back for Christmas. To this day she has never forgot that special and unique Christmas gift. I know this because she has brought it up at family events and gatherings with friends over and over for the last 5 years!
Care enough to give the gift she will remember forever!
It is very important you don’t buy a cheap mop, you really need to spend over $20.00 on a good one to make the lasting impact you are shooting for. I went the extra mile and used my label maker to write “Kim’s Mop” on the handle, that right there really pushed this gift from the amazing category to the epic gift I was going for. If you follow my instructions, I guarantee you will give her a Christmas she will never forget. Never!
Greg Rosen is a Father, Husband, Realtor and humorist writer for several major newspapers. Questions or comments can be sent to [email protected].