I hate To Carpool With My Wife

                                                                                                                                           

These record high gas prices are really testing my marriage. With a gallon of gas costing $5.00 these days, we must now carpool to survive financially. The problem is she likes the temperature hot, I like it cold, I like classic rock and she likes a mellow country music station. I like it quiet, she likes to talk and yesterday I found lip stick, hand lotion & feminine products in MY center console!

Time for a marriage counselor?  

I’m not sure how much longer I can live like this. I think if I could just get a little break, something to help me through these extremely challenging times I would be ok. Maybe the guy running things will go with the highly successful plan he has used in the past. If he would just make a mandate to have everyone stop driving for 2 weeks to flatten the curve that could be the break I need. This time unlike the mask thing, I will support his recommendation 100% if it gets her out of my car. 

The CDC is providing great information now! 

Speaking of the mask mandates. I thought the constant change in information from the CDC on mask mandates was confusing. But now I want to go on the record as saying I agree with the new CDC mask recommendations. I think putting a mask over your eyes while pumping gas will in fact reduce your chances of having a heart attack. 

How do you get people to buy electric vehicles when they don’t want to?

The other day I was thinking if I wanted to eliminate gas powered vehicles and replace them with electric cars, what would I do. Call me crazy, but If I ran the free world, I would just need to devise a plan to make gas so expensive people would be left with no other option than an electric car for transportation. All I would need to do is eliminate oil and gas subsidies, close all the pipelines, throw billions of taxpayer dollars at the electric car industries and put major restrictions on new drilling. Maybe I could pressure financial institutions that fund the gas industry to not offer any financial assistance. But these are radical ideas and hard to do so I would need some type of distraction to make this work.  If I could somehow cause historic high inflation and throw in the possibility of war with a foreign country, then this crazy idea might work!  Even so, I’m just not into the whole electric car thing. I can’t see any situation where I would have the desire to own one. If gas powered cars were outlawed and I was being forced to buy an electric vehicle, I would do whatever I could to find another means of transportation. At this point I would buy a donkey for transportation over an electric vehicle, and you can bet your ass I would name him Brandon. 

 Greg Rosen is a Father, Husband, Realtor and humorist writer for several major newspapers. Questions or comments can be sent to [email protected].  Please share if you like what you see.