Every year an estimated 188.9 million Americans say they’re determined to learn something new, make a lifestyle change or set a goal to better themselves. The top six categories that keep us to this holiday tradition relate to money, health, career, self-improvement, family, and love. I’m happy to report, since I know you really wanted to know, my resolutions do in fact fall into these categories.
My resolutions for 2022
Let’s start with the big one, Money, I’ve decided to just move on with my life and forget all the baggage that goes with it. So let me say right now I’m sorry, If I owe you money I’m moving on.
For my health I’m taking this to a whole new level. I’m not saying I’m out of shape, but numerous times last year I watched a show on tv I didn’t even like because the remote had fallen onto the floor. I’m going to start out with a simple goal on improving my health, like trying to lose just enough weight that my stomach doesn’t wiggle and jiggle while brushing my teeth.
In my career I know I’ve made some bad decisions. Instead of beating myself up over all the bad decisions and lack of good decisions, I decided it would be a lot easier to make better bad decisions.
Fact: Wearing pants more often is an improvement
In regard to self- improvement, I think most of you probably think like I do. When I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror, I was having problems finding areas for improvement. After several hours of serious contemplation, the only thing I could think of was I should probably wear pants more often.
As far as my family goes, I am truly blessed with the family I have, especially my wonderful daughter. I can’t think of anything I would want to change. Ok, there is one resolution I can think of. Never again will I walk into my grandfather’s bathroom without knocking. Sadly, I now know that my Grandpa cleans the shower naked.
Animated voices may not set the mood
Love is the easiest resolution. I thought after 30 amazing years of marriage that I was a master at the “Love” part. Being open minded and always willing to improve when possible I decided to ask my wife if there was anywhere I needed improvement. I anticipated a long pause, maybe some deep thought, followed by her saying something incredibly touching and heartwarming.
Nope, she practically jumped out of her chair with a noticeably elevated level of excitement in her voice. It was like she had just found buried treasure and wanted to tell the world about it. Apparently, she has never liked my near perfect Mickey Mouse impressions while we are intimate. I know what you’re thinking, it shocked me as well.
I think it’s time for me to be more realistic in my goals and resolutions because as I get older I’m finding change rather difficult. Since I know I’ll make mistakes this year, my new year’s resolution is to try and make mistakes in new and different ways. That’s a resolution I know I can do successfully.
Greg Rosen is a Father, Husband, Realtor and humorist writer for several major newspapers. Questions or comments can be sent to [email protected]. Please share if you like what you see.