On Friday, my coffee cup disappeared. Contrary to what you may have heard, I did not buy the “Greg: World’s Greatest Lover” mug for myself. I asked around the office and no one admitted anything, but then I noticed a broken piece of it on the floor. Someone had busted my Cup! Feeling frustrated with the lack of honesty, I put up a reward poster. On it was a picture of me holding the cup at the beach, just as the sun was coming up. It was a very emotional photo. Still, no one came forward, so I bought a memorial vase and put the last piece of the cup in it and placed it on display for all to see. Later that day I had a service during everyone’s lunch hoping the guilty party would confess. As I played Diane Ross’, “Missing You”, during the eulogy I carefully watched my coworkers. I was hoping for a clue as to who the culprit was but saw none. It is possible this is part of a larger conspiracy, Last month, someone took all the staples out of my stapler. I’m not sure who would ever do something like this, but trust me I will find you and it won’t be pretty when I do.
Greg Rosen is a humor writer, Realtor, father and husband. Questions or comments are appreciated: [email protected]. If you like what you see please share.